So far I have gotten asked like 3 people if some guy has asked me out yet. Psht. I have only been asked out once and I try not to tell myslef that I was his number like 3 to ask. No offence to my friend, he is a really nice guy and I had a tons of fun on this date but I still was probably like number 3. When I am just walking around campus I wonder "Why do these guy's go for the skanky girls?"
So to get my point across; NO I HAVE NOT BEEN ASKED OUT YET!!! I have been looked at a couple of tims by some cute boys but you never know what they are thinking about. Its probably cause I look at them thinking that they are cute and what it would be like to talk to them. I know its like the 1st week of school but it still worries me sometimes.
Anyway on a happier note I love my archeology class so far. We have had only one class and I am loving it. Im so excited to do more things in that class. I was put into a stupid math class and we started to learn about fractions. FRACTIONS!!! What am I 2? Im going to die in that class. These girls are like "Oh I finally get it!" What? How old are you? Gah, if I die next week, you will understand.
So now I am just sitting here watching "How to lose a guy in 10 day's" with my roomies. Haha pretty nice just to hang out with them. We went to a place on campus to watch Thor with everyone. We had to leave early cause we couldn't see the screen on the hill. We could hear it just not see it. Guess I will go find someone where to watch it.
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Forgetful
Everywhere I go I find people who has some characteristics of the kid I like. Is it really going to be this hard to get over him? We are 2 and a half hours away from each other but yet I see him everywhere. Even some girls look like his sisters. I don't want it to be this way. I want someone to move in and take over. I don't want to look around and see him. Its bothersome.
Monday, August 29, 2011
Excerise
So today was the first day of real college classes. My first class wasnt until 9:30. I like not having it until 9:30. I get to sleep. My class tomorrow doesn't start until 12:00. So I woke up and got ready then went to history. I almost fell asleep. He seems cool but he just talked about what was expected and blah blah. Then I had one hour until math. So I went and looked at the job board and I need to call someone. I should rememeber to do that tomorrow. I walked around and then went to the pe building to have math. How odd. My teacher is African so she has a heavy African accent. Its hard to understand her. I came home, at lunch and read some of my assignments. I went back for english. That class seems really fun. There is like 20 of us and the teacher is really funny. I hated english cause of my high school teachers. So after that I took a bus and I was wanting to go to Walmart to get some milk. I found out that I was on the bus to go near Idaho...... So I got off when I realized that and then I walked all the way to Walmart. It took forever. About 45-1 hour. I was so sweaty. Luckly I saw my roomie at Walmart and I got a ride back. So we waited and then went to Home Evening. Not family cause we are not family. Then we watched Bachelor Pad and here we are now. I think Im going to start Bachelor Pad from the start. Haha I blame Holly.
Nothing else to say. Just watch what bus you are taking and make sure it is not taking you out of state. I almost died. Hahaha
Nothing else to say. Just watch what bus you are taking and make sure it is not taking you out of state. I almost died. Hahaha
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Public
Should this really be a publis mattter? Im thining that I should make it private. What say you? Hahaha Im not sure. Im just thinking that some of the things that I say should only be for some people. Like the whole kid liking thing. hahah that was a personal matter that was hard. But I guess there is people who kind of go through the same thing and they are relieved that they know people are going through it to. Like someone in my old ward was kind of going through the same thing but it was a little different.
So today I woke up at like 10:30 I was so happy that I got to sleep. So I watched The Office season 7. Then I got ready for church. In my ward there is like a 12 girl to 1 boy ratio. Its sad but kind of funny. We came back and I skyped my fam bam. My cousin had a baby and she named in Canyon. I think it is cute. I want to name a girl Max. I think that its a cute girl name. Anyway I had top roman and it made me even hotter. I played Roller Coaster Tycoon and then I watched some Stargate. I miss Stargate. Me and my 2 other roommates went to the "manditory" meeting. We split up into groups and played 2 truths and 1 lie and then they talked about fire sprinklers and stuff like that. We had rootbeer flots and blah blah blah. I came up took a shower and now I am chilling with a roomie who is making muffins and listening to StarCraft songs. hahaha. The other roommates came back and 3 are gone.
I kind of can't wait until class tomorrow. I get to meet new people. Its going to be weird at first but after that it will be awesome. I can't wait until the Human vs. Zombies game. You sign up and like I don't know how many people are Zombies but you are wearing a bandanna and if you are touched you are Zombie. You can stop them by hitting them with a nerf gun or a sock ball. Hahaha I can't wait.
Things are progressivly getting better. Im starting to make noises, which is good for me. Keeps me saine. Hahaha you get to know me ask making noises. Hahaha
I've been thinking about listening to The Fire of The Covenant by Shawna Belt Edwards. She is in my ward and she made up this song. We used it for our Trek theme and and we sung that song a lot. Its so beautiful. I love listening and singing that song.
So today I woke up at like 10:30 I was so happy that I got to sleep. So I watched The Office season 7. Then I got ready for church. In my ward there is like a 12 girl to 1 boy ratio. Its sad but kind of funny. We came back and I skyped my fam bam. My cousin had a baby and she named in Canyon. I think it is cute. I want to name a girl Max. I think that its a cute girl name. Anyway I had top roman and it made me even hotter. I played Roller Coaster Tycoon and then I watched some Stargate. I miss Stargate. Me and my 2 other roommates went to the "manditory" meeting. We split up into groups and played 2 truths and 1 lie and then they talked about fire sprinklers and stuff like that. We had rootbeer flots and blah blah blah. I came up took a shower and now I am chilling with a roomie who is making muffins and listening to StarCraft songs. hahaha. The other roommates came back and 3 are gone.
I kind of can't wait until class tomorrow. I get to meet new people. Its going to be weird at first but after that it will be awesome. I can't wait until the Human vs. Zombies game. You sign up and like I don't know how many people are Zombies but you are wearing a bandanna and if you are touched you are Zombie. You can stop them by hitting them with a nerf gun or a sock ball. Hahaha I can't wait.
Things are progressivly getting better. Im starting to make noises, which is good for me. Keeps me saine. Hahaha you get to know me ask making noises. Hahaha
I've been thinking about listening to The Fire of The Covenant by Shawna Belt Edwards. She is in my ward and she made up this song. We used it for our Trek theme and and we sung that song a lot. Its so beautiful. I love listening and singing that song.
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Not that intresting
Today ended up being an okay day. Woke up went to the last day of the long connections class. I never got to see Trey. We had an assembly and the guy who wrote "I died in the Attic" spoke to us. He was really funny. When I got home 3 girls were getting ready to leave to go home for the weekend. So I am roomieless right now. I can do whatever in this room and not worry about waking her. I did laundry today and that took forever. I was really bored so I got ice cream with Frodo. I love cake batter ice cream. So good. I don't have church until 1 tomorrow so I am going to sleep in. :) That makes me really happy.
Hahaha my RA has a manditory party tomorrow that he wants everyone to go to and if you can't make it you have to talk to him but the 3 girls left without talking to him. I thought that was pretty funny. I really want to get to know him so I can see what type of person he is.
I can't wait until classes start and I get to make new friends. Im so excited to get on with my life and do new things. This new thing also me getting a job. Hopfully. I need a job.
Well......... peace.
Hahaha my RA has a manditory party tomorrow that he wants everyone to go to and if you can't make it you have to talk to him but the 3 girls left without talking to him. I thought that was pretty funny. I really want to get to know him so I can see what type of person he is.
I can't wait until classes start and I get to make new friends. Im so excited to get on with my life and do new things. This new thing also me getting a job. Hopfully. I need a job.
Well......... peace.
Party!!!!
This is starting to feel like a journal to me. Well whatever this is my life and I can do whatever so don't get bored reading. So we all woke up late but fortunatly got to the crowded bus stop. The bus was so crowded I had to stand. That was weird and the bus got really hot really fast with all the peopl on the bus. So we went to our classes and I was a little bit early but our teacher brought muffins and orange juice. It was good. I got a free highlighter cause I read my schools email and talked to the helper. I really wanted to talk to Trey today but I didn't get to. Maybe tomorrow. Hopefully tomorrow. I want to get to know what kind of person he is. Today we did a team building excerise. The one if you are stranded on the moon label these in importants. Then the food people came and talked to us about healthy eating and we played jepordy. That was fun, I couldn't find the f button for awhile. Its really dark. I made people laugh, yes!!! I ate lunch by myslef cause Frodo hates me, jk he ate with his connections class. So later I hung out with Reddie. I went back to class and we moved to another building to ask some questions to some teachers. After we talked about tests and homework and then we were free. This was like an hour and a half early it was awesome. So I waited at the bus stop with a girl in my class.
I got back and April and Erica were already home but they left and the Holly got home. We went to the postal office in the main building to send a package to a missionary that was having some problems. I saw Frodo for like 2 seocnds but then he was gone. We got back and I think we just hung and then got ready for this taste of our city. So we got ready. Ashlee and I went to the bus stop cause she invited a friend and she wanted him to know that we were coming and not to get on the bus. So we got there and there was a bus but it was so full the guy had to say no to some people. We say Ashlee's friend, Alex, the kid with the hundred dollar bill yesterday who was in the magic show with the guy. We waited and the rest of our roommates came. We decided to drive. So I went in 3 seperate cars. We got there and we met up with everyone else. We got free food and I talked to this Alex kid. He was cool and attractive and he is a Return Missionary. I think I freaked him out with one of my little jokes. Like we got some water from one store and I told him not to drink it cause it was bad and he kept asking me why and I told him I drugged it and he said thats not a good way to make friends then I jokingly said I don't like friends. I don't know if he tookt hat seriously or not but I told him that I was kidding. He kind of stopped talking to me. I thought it was funny. Apparently he does not have my sense of humor. Maybe.
We came back to our dorm and one of Alex's roomates, Simmon from England who was hanging out with us the whole time, stayed and Alex and then Kaylee. Holly invited some friends but they left during the movie. We watched House Bunny. That movie is pretty funny. I need to watch it by myself to get the real feeling. I don't know if Alex thought I was a freak or not but he stood by me a lot so I was confused. I really need class to start so I can start talking to new people. I need to meet a lot of boys. I need to find my type. Well I thought I knew my type in high school but a lot has changed while comeing up here.
Its so hot!!! Why is it so hot up here?!?!?!?!?!?! Saw RA Tyler, but I didn't see his hickie. Darn I kind of want to see it. Haha I wonder if he found the postet note. He came out of that room so I wonder. Well all my roommates are asleep usually a couple are awake. I don't even know if one is back or not, Shacy. I think she might be out.....
Saturday, still got to wake up early to go to the connections class. At least it only lasts until 12 so I get to go home and do laundry!!! :| Well good night. Well if it is night where you are.... I guess.
I got back and April and Erica were already home but they left and the Holly got home. We went to the postal office in the main building to send a package to a missionary that was having some problems. I saw Frodo for like 2 seocnds but then he was gone. We got back and I think we just hung and then got ready for this taste of our city. So we got ready. Ashlee and I went to the bus stop cause she invited a friend and she wanted him to know that we were coming and not to get on the bus. So we got there and there was a bus but it was so full the guy had to say no to some people. We say Ashlee's friend, Alex, the kid with the hundred dollar bill yesterday who was in the magic show with the guy. We waited and the rest of our roommates came. We decided to drive. So I went in 3 seperate cars. We got there and we met up with everyone else. We got free food and I talked to this Alex kid. He was cool and attractive and he is a Return Missionary. I think I freaked him out with one of my little jokes. Like we got some water from one store and I told him not to drink it cause it was bad and he kept asking me why and I told him I drugged it and he said thats not a good way to make friends then I jokingly said I don't like friends. I don't know if he tookt hat seriously or not but I told him that I was kidding. He kind of stopped talking to me. I thought it was funny. Apparently he does not have my sense of humor. Maybe.
We came back to our dorm and one of Alex's roomates, Simmon from England who was hanging out with us the whole time, stayed and Alex and then Kaylee. Holly invited some friends but they left during the movie. We watched House Bunny. That movie is pretty funny. I need to watch it by myself to get the real feeling. I don't know if Alex thought I was a freak or not but he stood by me a lot so I was confused. I really need class to start so I can start talking to new people. I need to meet a lot of boys. I need to find my type. Well I thought I knew my type in high school but a lot has changed while comeing up here.
Its so hot!!! Why is it so hot up here?!?!?!?!?!?! Saw RA Tyler, but I didn't see his hickie. Darn I kind of want to see it. Haha I wonder if he found the postet note. He came out of that room so I wonder. Well all my roommates are asleep usually a couple are awake. I don't even know if one is back or not, Shacy. I think she might be out.....
Saturday, still got to wake up early to go to the connections class. At least it only lasts until 12 so I get to go home and do laundry!!! :| Well good night. Well if it is night where you are.... I guess.
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Yet Another weird day
"I woke this morning *ahh ahh* with this feeling inside me that I can't explain like a wait that I've been carried been carried away." Feels Like Today by Rascal Flatts
Thats what popped into my head when I started blogging so I decided to type it down. So anyways I did wake up this morning and I was ready in like 10. I can't see why it takes some girls 30min-1hour to get ready. I mean some girls do there hair, add five but everything else.... uh you don't need that. Hahah but we waited for the bus and we started to walk to school when it showed up. You got to understand that they say we are on campus but we are far away from campus. It takes like 15 minutes to get to the beginning of the campus. Our connections class started at 9:00 and it was 9. I hate being late. So I got there and of course everyone has to stare. So the lesson goes on. I was so tired I almost feel asleep a couple of times. I feel bad cause my teacher is really nice and he is funny but Im just so darn tired. So we have lunch and I decided to ome back to my dorm. I took the bus and I was alone. Holly was going to come back but the bus never showed up to her stop so I cleaned the dishes and left early for the bus. I did not want to be late again. So I was about 20 minutes early so I wondered around the bookstore. I went to class. This really attractive boy named Trey sat next to me. I really wanted to talk to him. Tomorrow I will for sure!!!!! We waited outside to go to our next workshop and I was talking to this girl, Cheynne, she didn't really want to talk to me. This is like the 3rd time. Okay whats wrong? Why don't you guys want to talk to me?
We get to the building and we learn about respecting others and making change. It was a really good lesson. I liked it. We went to the library, which btw the kid that I liked his grandpa or great grandpa was the founder of it. Muhahaha. I don't know why I did that. So we learned about the library and we went home. Shacy was home. She is a cutie. I like her. So I talked to her. The others soon came home and we intrudced ourselves to some of our neighbors and we got WIFI!!!!! FINALLY!!!!! We have been using network cables. But anyways we did our things and I sat with some people at one point. Oh when they got home I sat with Erica and Holly cause Shacy was napping. So then we went to our computers to have fun with the Wifi. Later I had dinner, I didn't burn it this time. I talked with some people and then it was soon to leave to this comedian/magician. He was hilarous!!!! I cried laughing. I was dying. He was so funny. His name is Tim Gabrielson. So funny. We took a picture with him but I think it was on Aprils camera. He has a book called Lemons to Laughter. I want to read it. Its a book that contains things to do to make yourseld and others laugh.
We left and we went to Erica's friends dorm and then we got some of Shacy's friends and went to a dorm near us. The whole 4th floor was partying and there was people from different dorms there. It was crazy. I saw a oremite visting some friends. It was weird. We got kicked out by the RA so we went outside and hung and then we played 4 square. A little while after I left cause it was getting weird/boring at the same time.
Each day gets better and weird at the same time. I like it cause Im getting to know my roomies more and I get to meet new people but some people are rude and don't want to talk to me. All 3 of those people were girls. Guess I got to go talk to some boys!!! Hahaha. YES!!! Boys are awesome. Haha
I have to do all these assignments for this connections class and it ends in 3 weeks. GAH!!! Well I guess they aren't hard and they just teach us about the college but I was thinking it was a fun class cause that was what everyone was telling me. One of my roomies is going canoing!!!! CANOING!!! Not fair!!!
Things are better. I just had a rough patch and Im going to keep having them but I know I can get threw them. :)
Thats what popped into my head when I started blogging so I decided to type it down. So anyways I did wake up this morning and I was ready in like 10. I can't see why it takes some girls 30min-1hour to get ready. I mean some girls do there hair, add five but everything else.... uh you don't need that. Hahah but we waited for the bus and we started to walk to school when it showed up. You got to understand that they say we are on campus but we are far away from campus. It takes like 15 minutes to get to the beginning of the campus. Our connections class started at 9:00 and it was 9. I hate being late. So I got there and of course everyone has to stare. So the lesson goes on. I was so tired I almost feel asleep a couple of times. I feel bad cause my teacher is really nice and he is funny but Im just so darn tired. So we have lunch and I decided to ome back to my dorm. I took the bus and I was alone. Holly was going to come back but the bus never showed up to her stop so I cleaned the dishes and left early for the bus. I did not want to be late again. So I was about 20 minutes early so I wondered around the bookstore. I went to class. This really attractive boy named Trey sat next to me. I really wanted to talk to him. Tomorrow I will for sure!!!!! We waited outside to go to our next workshop and I was talking to this girl, Cheynne, she didn't really want to talk to me. This is like the 3rd time. Okay whats wrong? Why don't you guys want to talk to me?
We get to the building and we learn about respecting others and making change. It was a really good lesson. I liked it. We went to the library, which btw the kid that I liked his grandpa or great grandpa was the founder of it. Muhahaha. I don't know why I did that. So we learned about the library and we went home. Shacy was home. She is a cutie. I like her. So I talked to her. The others soon came home and we intrudced ourselves to some of our neighbors and we got WIFI!!!!! FINALLY!!!!! We have been using network cables. But anyways we did our things and I sat with some people at one point. Oh when they got home I sat with Erica and Holly cause Shacy was napping. So then we went to our computers to have fun with the Wifi. Later I had dinner, I didn't burn it this time. I talked with some people and then it was soon to leave to this comedian/magician. He was hilarous!!!! I cried laughing. I was dying. He was so funny. His name is Tim Gabrielson. So funny. We took a picture with him but I think it was on Aprils camera. He has a book called Lemons to Laughter. I want to read it. Its a book that contains things to do to make yourseld and others laugh.
We left and we went to Erica's friends dorm and then we got some of Shacy's friends and went to a dorm near us. The whole 4th floor was partying and there was people from different dorms there. It was crazy. I saw a oremite visting some friends. It was weird. We got kicked out by the RA so we went outside and hung and then we played 4 square. A little while after I left cause it was getting weird/boring at the same time.
Each day gets better and weird at the same time. I like it cause Im getting to know my roomies more and I get to meet new people but some people are rude and don't want to talk to me. All 3 of those people were girls. Guess I got to go talk to some boys!!! Hahaha. YES!!! Boys are awesome. Haha
I have to do all these assignments for this connections class and it ends in 3 weeks. GAH!!! Well I guess they aren't hard and they just teach us about the college but I was thinking it was a fun class cause that was what everyone was telling me. One of my roomies is going canoing!!!! CANOING!!! Not fair!!!
Things are better. I just had a rough patch and Im going to keep having them but I know I can get threw them. :)
Really?
So today I found out that my hott RA has a hickie. WHAT?!?! He is a return missionary and he has only been back for 2 months. He must be desperate or something. We had this freshman dance which a lot of people where at and apparently he was totally grinding some girl. Really? You are that desperate? One of his roommates told me that he cant get girls numbers. Well duh!!!
Back to my day. I woke up and we were all getting reading for our connections classes. We left and we thought there would be a bus at one of the bus stations but there was not any. So we walked fast to the building that was far away. We get to this big auditorium and we get seperated into our groups. They had this assembly and they told us to the Fight song. They didn't give us no words or nothing so we were all confused. I went with my group and we waited outside for the rest of our group. We hiked to the others side of campus to our room. We interviewed the random person next to us and shared it to everyone. I tried to make some friends and I would talk and be friendly and they would just nudge me off. Well okay if you don't want to hang out with the cooliest person you will ever meet.... that is fine with me. We went to this thing where they put or personalities to what job we should take. Mmmmm some of those careers where not for me. We went to lunch and I hung out with Reddie. We saw another Oremite. That was pretty cool. We went back and my teacher talked about the difference between high school and college. Pretty boring I felt sorry for him cause everyone was dead. We walked over to another building where they taught us about the computer lab and the website. Woohoo. We went outside and they were going to show us around but most of us had already found are classes so she took like 5 people around and the rest of us left. I talked to some girls and then left. I was 30 min early so I sat at my computer. Some people slowly got home and I talked to them. I don't really remember what happened. I think we talked and then we decided to go to walmart to get something for my roommates Missionary who is having a hard time. So we did that and then went to the distribution center and got some more things we then went back. We all sat in the living room/kitchen and talked about our first kisses. I told them that I haven't and they told me not to worry about it and its not that big of a deal. Haha but I still want one.... hahaha
2 girls left and the rest of us went into our own worlds. We, 3, went to the connections party. It was getting dark and stuff. We found our roomies and some of their friends and we went and mingled. We got to the front where the dj was and we were just casually fun dancing. The DJ anounces that the party is starting and everyone swarms. People were falling over and pushing. One girl left and before I left the crowed I looked back and Im pretty sure someone was trying to grind me. I don't know what to think about that. It kind of freaks me out. I know that these dances are completely different from high school dances. Peopel said that the dances will get better but Im having a hard time believing it. Holly and I left thr crowd. Later we found the rest of our group and we left. Holly and I walked back. It reminded me of hicking during girls camp. Holly stayed outside to talk to someone on the phone. I went upstairs thinking that Ashlee was back. Nope. I sat there. A girl and her friend were going around seeing if people wanted to play some games. I joined.
This is where it begins. We play some animal game and the a game callled Mao.... hard game. We stopped playing and we started to talk about our RM. A girl from another floor wrote on a postage note "Extracricular Activites: Girls!" We were dying. Every time the door open the girl would freak. We sat and talked and Tyler's, our RA, roommate is freaky. He asked questions like "How would you torture someone?" I answered but it was weird. Anyways it was like 11:45 when I came to my dorm.
Man what a weird day. I really need to sleep.... so goodnight moon.... hahahahaha
Back to my day. I woke up and we were all getting reading for our connections classes. We left and we thought there would be a bus at one of the bus stations but there was not any. So we walked fast to the building that was far away. We get to this big auditorium and we get seperated into our groups. They had this assembly and they told us to the Fight song. They didn't give us no words or nothing so we were all confused. I went with my group and we waited outside for the rest of our group. We hiked to the others side of campus to our room. We interviewed the random person next to us and shared it to everyone. I tried to make some friends and I would talk and be friendly and they would just nudge me off. Well okay if you don't want to hang out with the cooliest person you will ever meet.... that is fine with me. We went to this thing where they put or personalities to what job we should take. Mmmmm some of those careers where not for me. We went to lunch and I hung out with Reddie. We saw another Oremite. That was pretty cool. We went back and my teacher talked about the difference between high school and college. Pretty boring I felt sorry for him cause everyone was dead. We walked over to another building where they taught us about the computer lab and the website. Woohoo. We went outside and they were going to show us around but most of us had already found are classes so she took like 5 people around and the rest of us left. I talked to some girls and then left. I was 30 min early so I sat at my computer. Some people slowly got home and I talked to them. I don't really remember what happened. I think we talked and then we decided to go to walmart to get something for my roommates Missionary who is having a hard time. So we did that and then went to the distribution center and got some more things we then went back. We all sat in the living room/kitchen and talked about our first kisses. I told them that I haven't and they told me not to worry about it and its not that big of a deal. Haha but I still want one.... hahaha
2 girls left and the rest of us went into our own worlds. We, 3, went to the connections party. It was getting dark and stuff. We found our roomies and some of their friends and we went and mingled. We got to the front where the dj was and we were just casually fun dancing. The DJ anounces that the party is starting and everyone swarms. People were falling over and pushing. One girl left and before I left the crowed I looked back and Im pretty sure someone was trying to grind me. I don't know what to think about that. It kind of freaks me out. I know that these dances are completely different from high school dances. Peopel said that the dances will get better but Im having a hard time believing it. Holly and I left thr crowd. Later we found the rest of our group and we left. Holly and I walked back. It reminded me of hicking during girls camp. Holly stayed outside to talk to someone on the phone. I went upstairs thinking that Ashlee was back. Nope. I sat there. A girl and her friend were going around seeing if people wanted to play some games. I joined.
This is where it begins. We play some animal game and the a game callled Mao.... hard game. We stopped playing and we started to talk about our RM. A girl from another floor wrote on a postage note "Extracricular Activites: Girls!" We were dying. Every time the door open the girl would freak. We sat and talked and Tyler's, our RA, roommate is freaky. He asked questions like "How would you torture someone?" I answered but it was weird. Anyways it was like 11:45 when I came to my dorm.
Man what a weird day. I really need to sleep.... so goodnight moon.... hahahahaha
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Better.....Again
So I asserted myself into my roomies room. I was sitting in my room for way to long and I was bored so I decided to go for it and ask them I could hang with them. They let me and I felt so much more better. We hung and we put up our tv. We sat and watched tv for a little bit and then we despersed again but I feel better cause now Im going to do it a lot more often to where the point we can be great friends. YA!!!!!! So Im going to play Roller Coaster Tycoon and feel good. :)
Idiot
And the idiot award goes to....... BRITNEY!!!!
Today I was making some dinner. It was something like a cup of noodles but a different type of food and brand. I put it in the microwave and I forgot to put water in it. Im an idiot. Holly noticed the smoke so she stoped it and opened it. Immediatly a wave of nasty burning smell comes. She quickly shut the door. She sprayed the area with smelly stuff. I apologized and I felt so bad. She suggested that we take it down stairs and outside. So I took it downstairs and outside. I opened it and threw out the food. We sat while it aired out. She went inside to play the piano and I sat there feeling like a complete idiot and wanting to move out. I feel so bad. I made the whole freaking dorm smell. I want to cry. The doors are closed and Im in my room sitting feeling bad cause Im an idiot. I was so excited today to get to know everyone. Then I did a stupid thing. Im an idiot.
Today I woke up and later around 12 we went and signed in for connections. I then walked around with Holly to see where her classes were. We went to the gym building and we watched peopel do gymnastics. That was pretty cool. I wanted to get to know everyone when we got back but April and Erika were not home. So I was at my computer trying to fix my Sanza. Holly left and I was lonesome. So I texted Frodo and went and hung out with him. It was probably like 45 minutes later when I went back to my dorm. Thats when that incident happened. Im an idiot. Frodo told me I could call him anytime but I don't like bugging people about what I am feeling. I like to listen to others but I just don't really tell people what I truly am feeling. Sorry to all those friends of mine who are reading this and are like "WHAT?" Sometimes I can tell them but other times I can't and I don't want to bug anyone so I will live with my stupidity for now. We still have like 5 hours before everyone goes to sleep. *banging my head against the wall saying "stupid, stupid, stupid"*
I can't wait until classes starts where I can meet new people. The first day I got here after my parents left I was thinking how I wanted to get married now so I didn't have to be lonely. Thats funny but some people do do that. Im not Im going to wait until Im like 21 at least. But I did think that.
Hopefully things will go better tonight and I wont have to be an idiot.....
This is part 1 of what I am kind of feeling right now
part 2 of what I am feeling. Not the whole song only some parts.
Today I was making some dinner. It was something like a cup of noodles but a different type of food and brand. I put it in the microwave and I forgot to put water in it. Im an idiot. Holly noticed the smoke so she stoped it and opened it. Immediatly a wave of nasty burning smell comes. She quickly shut the door. She sprayed the area with smelly stuff. I apologized and I felt so bad. She suggested that we take it down stairs and outside. So I took it downstairs and outside. I opened it and threw out the food. We sat while it aired out. She went inside to play the piano and I sat there feeling like a complete idiot and wanting to move out. I feel so bad. I made the whole freaking dorm smell. I want to cry. The doors are closed and Im in my room sitting feeling bad cause Im an idiot. I was so excited today to get to know everyone. Then I did a stupid thing. Im an idiot.
Today I woke up and later around 12 we went and signed in for connections. I then walked around with Holly to see where her classes were. We went to the gym building and we watched peopel do gymnastics. That was pretty cool. I wanted to get to know everyone when we got back but April and Erika were not home. So I was at my computer trying to fix my Sanza. Holly left and I was lonesome. So I texted Frodo and went and hung out with him. It was probably like 45 minutes later when I went back to my dorm. Thats when that incident happened. Im an idiot. Frodo told me I could call him anytime but I don't like bugging people about what I am feeling. I like to listen to others but I just don't really tell people what I truly am feeling. Sorry to all those friends of mine who are reading this and are like "WHAT?" Sometimes I can tell them but other times I can't and I don't want to bug anyone so I will live with my stupidity for now. We still have like 5 hours before everyone goes to sleep. *banging my head against the wall saying "stupid, stupid, stupid"*
I can't wait until classes starts where I can meet new people. The first day I got here after my parents left I was thinking how I wanted to get married now so I didn't have to be lonely. Thats funny but some people do do that. Im not Im going to wait until Im like 21 at least. But I did think that.
Hopefully things will go better tonight and I wont have to be an idiot.....
This is part 1 of what I am kind of feeling right now
part 2 of what I am feeling. Not the whole song only some parts.
Monday, August 22, 2011
Alone
I have never felt so alone. 3 roomates are back. They are in another room hanging out and have a fantastic time. Then there is me sitting all alone. I guess I have 2 options.... try and be friends or just be close people but not even talk to them. I want to try and be friends but it is so hard when they all know each other. I know its only the 3rd day but it is really hard right now. I want to call someone but its 11:00 at night and most people I know are asleep. Ugh. I don't want to cry right now cause I know someone will walk in while Im crying. I wish I had like a boyfriend or someone cause then I would call them and I would feel better. Lonely. So lonely. Another trail another day I guess. I want to be there friends, but I don't want to insert myself into there rooms when they are having a good time and then I will be in there interrupting there good time. I want to cry so bad right now. Ugh tears are coming. I want to talk to Reddie or Frodo but I know Frodo will think Im stupid and I already told Reddie a little bit about it. Maybe I will call someone tomorrow. I don't know who but someone. Maybe I will call North Carolina cause she is going through some of the same things but in a different lonely way.
Im so lonely.
Im so lonely.
why?
So today was eventful. I woke up and then I went to the campus. I searched for a job. All they have is babysitting or lawn care. A. The lawn care wont last very long and Im already dieing in the heat. B. I don't do so great watching other peoples children. C. I have school and if I add a even more stressful load on I will die right there.
I was going to go visit Frodo but he was busy. I then went and hung out with Reddie. We chilled in her gheto appartment for awhile then we went to the Library. It was nice and cool compared to everything else. We looked around and then went to the main student center. I bought a sprite cause I was dying. We then split and I went back to my dorm. Another girl came and she is very nice. She is besties with the girls arlready here so yippie for me. Another awkward moment for me. I don't remember what I did after..... hm I think I sat at my computer and read 07 Ghost and did nothing. I had PB and J for dinner and then we went to Home Evening. There wasn't very many people there but we still hung out with them. It was nice. I found out there was a girl from my home town and I want to go meet her. I will stalk her down tomorrow. We went back and again I was on my laptop. Reddie asked to go get ice cream. So I went and did not get ice cream. We hung and she walked back with me. At my dorm we met up with a girl named Heather. She seems really nice, I want to get to know her.
Well I don't know if I already posted this but my RA is HOTT!!! I want to get to know him even more. Hahaha. But anyway's. I feel awkward around my roomies. I am the odd man out. They all know each other. I kind of wish that I was put into a place where nobody knew each other. Blah, but I will get through it. They are all nice but they all hang out and talk about the same things that they did. I am alone right now and I feel like crying. I don't know why, probably because I feel alone cause they don't know me and I don't know them. I would like to get to know them but whatever.
I would really like to met some new guys. Guys would bring my self esteem up. I can't wait tell classes start next week. I get to meet a lot more people and I get to meet boys. People think that boys come running at me like some girls but that is the biggest fart lie ever!!!!!!!!!!! I have only been asked out once. Im hopping that guys will talk to me like I will talk to them.
Whatever. Okay I am hearing some really strange noises right now. They sound like cats but I am on the 4th floor. Im kind of freaking out right now. Im all alone and there is strange noises. That makes me really wnat to cry now. I don't want to turn on my music, I am a little scared right now. doo daaa doo.... waiting it out while my heart calms down.....
So I guess I will wait for my roomie to come back and I will play a game or read some manga. Peace.
I was going to go visit Frodo but he was busy. I then went and hung out with Reddie. We chilled in her gheto appartment for awhile then we went to the Library. It was nice and cool compared to everything else. We looked around and then went to the main student center. I bought a sprite cause I was dying. We then split and I went back to my dorm. Another girl came and she is very nice. She is besties with the girls arlready here so yippie for me. Another awkward moment for me. I don't remember what I did after..... hm I think I sat at my computer and read 07 Ghost and did nothing. I had PB and J for dinner and then we went to Home Evening. There wasn't very many people there but we still hung out with them. It was nice. I found out there was a girl from my home town and I want to go meet her. I will stalk her down tomorrow. We went back and again I was on my laptop. Reddie asked to go get ice cream. So I went and did not get ice cream. We hung and she walked back with me. At my dorm we met up with a girl named Heather. She seems really nice, I want to get to know her.
Well I don't know if I already posted this but my RA is HOTT!!! I want to get to know him even more. Hahaha. But anyway's. I feel awkward around my roomies. I am the odd man out. They all know each other. I kind of wish that I was put into a place where nobody knew each other. Blah, but I will get through it. They are all nice but they all hang out and talk about the same things that they did. I am alone right now and I feel like crying. I don't know why, probably because I feel alone cause they don't know me and I don't know them. I would like to get to know them but whatever.
I would really like to met some new guys. Guys would bring my self esteem up. I can't wait tell classes start next week. I get to meet a lot more people and I get to meet boys. People think that boys come running at me like some girls but that is the biggest fart lie ever!!!!!!!!!!! I have only been asked out once. Im hopping that guys will talk to me like I will talk to them.
Whatever. Okay I am hearing some really strange noises right now. They sound like cats but I am on the 4th floor. Im kind of freaking out right now. Im all alone and there is strange noises. That makes me really wnat to cry now. I don't want to turn on my music, I am a little scared right now. doo daaa doo.... waiting it out while my heart calms down.....
So I guess I will wait for my roomie to come back and I will play a game or read some manga. Peace.
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Better
I feel better now. I woke up and went to church. It was different. All of the buildings met together in this ginormouse church, they call it the Toaster. I saw a reddie. I sat with my roomies. They did the sacrement and blach blah. After 2 speakers we were all standing singing "As Zions Youth in Ladder Day's" will singing the lights went out. They couldn't get them back on so we sang "Come Come Ye Saints." After that our stake president spoke. We got split up into our wards. My ward seems pretty cool. They all seem really nice. I can't wait tell Home Evening with them. But we introduced are selves and got our picture taken for the ward directory. During this the lights went out again so we switched room cause our room was pitch black. I told everyone that I ahd over 1700 pokemon cards. They all loved it. Haha. Frodo told me thats the way to a guy and I told him that is what I intended. Haha. I thought I was funny. But we invited these guys to dinner. So later we were cooking our potatoes and other food and the fire alarm goes off. Frodo and Reddie were here with me. We went outside and find out that someone got something stuck in there stove so it burnt. Hahaha so Frodo and Reddie left and we finished dinner. The boys came over. They all seemed really nice. They were kind of shy but really funny.
So now I am here sitting in my room typing. I can't go to bed yet cause I never go to bed until like 1 its only 11:30. Haha. I feel really good. I have a motivation in me right now to get to know me roomies. Im trying to get to know my roomie that sleeps in my room. She's really nice and funny. She is super cute too. Well Im bored.......
Hm, Im trying to finish reading xxxholic. But I haven't got the chance to read it yet. Also I need to finish Death Note. But its going to be hard reading that book online. It takes forever to read it when I have the book. Maybe I will try again later when there is more free time.
Laptops are cool. I can sit however I want and still use them.
My arms hurt from carring boxes to the forth floor. Ugh they hurt!!! My noise is peeling!!! STOP PEELING!!!
My classes start in a week. I have one more week. Tomorrow Im going to wonder around campus and find my class. I am also going to go try to find a job at the STudent Employment. (I know the s and the t is capitalized but I am to lazy to change it.) Im going to visit Reddie and Frodo. Im excited. Well I guess I will try and read.
So now I am here sitting in my room typing. I can't go to bed yet cause I never go to bed until like 1 its only 11:30. Haha. I feel really good. I have a motivation in me right now to get to know me roomies. Im trying to get to know my roomie that sleeps in my room. She's really nice and funny. She is super cute too. Well Im bored.......
Hm, Im trying to finish reading xxxholic. But I haven't got the chance to read it yet. Also I need to finish Death Note. But its going to be hard reading that book online. It takes forever to read it when I have the book. Maybe I will try again later when there is more free time.
Laptops are cool. I can sit however I want and still use them.
My arms hurt from carring boxes to the forth floor. Ugh they hurt!!! My noise is peeling!!! STOP PEELING!!!
My classes start in a week. I have one more week. Tomorrow Im going to wonder around campus and find my class. I am also going to go try to find a job at the STudent Employment. (I know the s and the t is capitalized but I am to lazy to change it.) Im going to visit Reddie and Frodo. Im excited. Well I guess I will try and read.
Saturday, August 20, 2011
New
I moved into my dorm today. It is 2 and a half hours away from my home. I cried at home cause I was leaving 2 sisters and a brother behind. I was also leaving my old life, the life that did me good and the life that skrewed me over half the time. But my parents drove me and we hung out. My whole entire roommated have moved in. There are 6 of us total. 4 of us are staying at our dorm tonight and the other 2 are gone. I wish I did that. I need more time to hang out with my fam bam. Im about to cry. I need to be strong. I need a familiar face. My friend had problems with his housing so he didn't move in today. I kind of wanted to see him just because he is a close friend and it would calm my nerves down. Im a little on edge right now. I want to talk to my roomies but I just sit by them and my mind is blank. Plus they all know each other. I am the odd man out. That makes me feel so much more better..... I need to see someone familiar. Im glad I am going to church tomorrow. Maybe that will calm me down. To bad its at 9 in the morning. I need sleep. I have been staying up late to much.
I hung out with my friends last night. Not all of them came but they were the cool ones that have been a great deal in my life. I cried when I was driving home. I was so depressed. I am depressed right now too. The kid I like was there. It made me happy to see him but sad that I will not see him for the longest time. We were talking about marriage and apparently up here where I am at is the #1 school in Utah to get married fast. He was silent that whole time. I think he still likes me. I wish I could of told him I still had feelings for him. Hopefully I can get over him soon.
I really want to go home but I know that if I stay up here long enough that things will get better but I am super home sick and its only been a couple of hours sense I've seen my parents. Im excited to go home and chill with my family. I hear that if you are gone for a couple of months from your family you get a better relationship with them. I need that. I need a better relationship with them. I have been so mean sometimes.
Im feeling a little better typing this. Maybe when school starts I will feel better too. I think I will go see some of my friends tomorrow and Skype some people.
There is no AC up in my dorm. I am dying of heat. Supposedly it was 104 earlier today. GAH!!! I almost died. I was sweating so bad.
I need to read some manga. Those will help me calm down. They help me forget what I was thinking about and just calm me down.
I need a familiar face. I wish that boy moved up today and I could have saw him once just to calm me down.
I hung out with my friends last night. Not all of them came but they were the cool ones that have been a great deal in my life. I cried when I was driving home. I was so depressed. I am depressed right now too. The kid I like was there. It made me happy to see him but sad that I will not see him for the longest time. We were talking about marriage and apparently up here where I am at is the #1 school in Utah to get married fast. He was silent that whole time. I think he still likes me. I wish I could of told him I still had feelings for him. Hopefully I can get over him soon.
I really want to go home but I know that if I stay up here long enough that things will get better but I am super home sick and its only been a couple of hours sense I've seen my parents. Im excited to go home and chill with my family. I hear that if you are gone for a couple of months from your family you get a better relationship with them. I need that. I need a better relationship with them. I have been so mean sometimes.
Im feeling a little better typing this. Maybe when school starts I will feel better too. I think I will go see some of my friends tomorrow and Skype some people.
There is no AC up in my dorm. I am dying of heat. Supposedly it was 104 earlier today. GAH!!! I almost died. I was sweating so bad.
I need to read some manga. Those will help me calm down. They help me forget what I was thinking about and just calm me down.
I need a familiar face. I wish that boy moved up today and I could have saw him once just to calm me down.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Pht
On Thursday I had a sleepover with one of my best friends. That was going to be the last time I was going to see her for a very very long time. So she came over and we stayed up playing Halo ODST until 3 in the morning. Pretty much the same thing like we did last time we had a sleepover. This time she had to leave at 7:45. So we got up at 7:30 and we waited for her mom. We just talked like we were going to see each other again. When her mom came we hugged and I was about to start crying. I kept my emotions bottled up but I watched her creepidly while she got in her car. I started crying. I went back into my room and still cried. I eventually fell back asleep for another two hours. It was very depressing. I was so sad that I was not going to see one of my best friends for a very long time.
On Tuesday I am going to go to all the houses of the friends that ment a lot to me. Im just going to give them some cookies and bubbles. Haha bubbles. I will probably be crying on the first person. Once I get to the kid that I like, the second person on my route. I will be bawling. I will probably start bawling at his place. Hahaha he's a good kid and I am going to miss him a lot. Im going to miss everyone a lot.
My sister had her baby shower today. It was boring!!! I had to take the pictures and I had to write down who gave them crap. Plus it was super hot. I was about to die when the time as coming up. My cousin who is also pregenant is due next week. She is huge!!! It looks like she is caring twins, but no just one baby. My aunt of this cousin brought me a basket with all this food and stuff for me. I was happy. It was a really heavy bag. My cousin, her son, is also going to cousin so she just thought that I would need one. Haha. Pretty sure I will.
I finished reading Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle. I like that manga a lot. As you can tell I like manga. Its very diferent. I like diferent things. Sometimes I wish my life was a manga so that I can have a more intresting life. Haha. Im currently readin XXXHolic, its apart of Tsubasa if you read it you would understand, Death Note, D.N. Angel, and St Dragon Girl. Hahaha love manga. Love love love love.
Im writing outlines for a book. I don't know if I want to make this book into a manga or a book. Im thinking manga so I can draw all these intresting people. Its a very good so far. It came from a dream and Im just adding things to it that will make more sense. Hahaha cause of course my dreams are all on crack and make no sense at all. Haha
On Tuesday I am going to go to all the houses of the friends that ment a lot to me. Im just going to give them some cookies and bubbles. Haha bubbles. I will probably be crying on the first person. Once I get to the kid that I like, the second person on my route. I will be bawling. I will probably start bawling at his place. Hahaha he's a good kid and I am going to miss him a lot. Im going to miss everyone a lot.
My sister had her baby shower today. It was boring!!! I had to take the pictures and I had to write down who gave them crap. Plus it was super hot. I was about to die when the time as coming up. My cousin who is also pregenant is due next week. She is huge!!! It looks like she is caring twins, but no just one baby. My aunt of this cousin brought me a basket with all this food and stuff for me. I was happy. It was a really heavy bag. My cousin, her son, is also going to cousin so she just thought that I would need one. Haha. Pretty sure I will.
I finished reading Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle. I like that manga a lot. As you can tell I like manga. Its very diferent. I like diferent things. Sometimes I wish my life was a manga so that I can have a more intresting life. Haha. Im currently readin XXXHolic, its apart of Tsubasa if you read it you would understand, Death Note, D.N. Angel, and St Dragon Girl. Hahaha love manga. Love love love love.
Im writing outlines for a book. I don't know if I want to make this book into a manga or a book. Im thinking manga so I can draw all these intresting people. Its a very good so far. It came from a dream and Im just adding things to it that will make more sense. Hahaha cause of course my dreams are all on crack and make no sense at all. Haha
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Eye See You
Monday, August 8, 2011
Just me
Im have been thinking of things lately. I wanted to post this yesterday but my dad loves to sit at the computer and watch Netflix for endless hours and the other computers are hopelessly slow. Whenever I get on my computer I always get distracted by things. Like Manga. Speaking of Manga I finished Special A. Its a cute/funny manga. I liked it a lot. Its a romace comedy, yes I noticed the romace. Im a girl and sometimes I need to let my romancey part out and its mostly through manga.
When reading romance manga I sometimes realize that a couple of people in the book remind me of my friends. They either remind be of them by appearence or by the way they act. These manga people are mostly in high school. They all have people who fall head over heels for them. Then in real life it happens for people too. Then there's me.
When I was about to turn 16 I was convinced that I would get asked out on that day. Bam nothing. I was hopeful that I would get asked out to homecoming or prom during my high school years. That never happened. For homecoming my senior year I went with one of my really good friends who always makes me feel like a girl and not some low life who is different from all other girls. We had fun with the 6 other girls who also did not get asked. I was so grateful for this friend. She was a junior during this but she is more like a college freshman to me. She has a big heart. I love her. During senior year I was hopeful that I would get asked to any of the other smaller guy ask girl dances. Nope. Prom came around. Someone told me that one of my best friends was going to ask me. I was so excited then I found out that he asked someone else. I was like "whatever he can ask someone else, maybe he wasn't even going to ask me cause I heard that from someone else."
Me and my friend decided to go to prom together because it was are senior year and we wanted to have fun. So we hung out and one of my YW leaders did our hair and then we got dresses, had a photo shoot, and then went down to the dance. At first we didn't know what to do cause it was just us so we hung around some people until our real group of friends came. They broke up into two groups and we hung with the one that let us join. Im glad they let us join. Near the end my "date" ;) was feeling sick and depressed. Depressed because the guy she liked was there with one of our really good friends. During the dance I would always look around just to see who was in the crowded dance area. I would see the other group, the part that split and I would just watch. Then the guy that I like and the one who pretty much tore me apart would be watching me too. It was awkward but I tried to show him that I was having fun without him. We were on the last song or the second to last song and one of my best friends, the one who was going to ask me, comes up to me and say's, "Britney, you look amazing." My heart melted. I never got compliment from a guy, I always get them from girls but not guy's. The other time I got a compliment was at preference earlier that year when I asked my good friends Tall Man. I was picking him up and his mom and sister were both telling me I looked amazing then he comes around the corner and just flats out say's I looks beautiful. That made me happy and at the preference dance he flaunted me around to everyone. Haha. But anyway I was so happy when he said that to me. I tried to give him a compliment back and I told him I liked his hair slicked back. Haha.
I've only been asked out on one date. That was a fun lax date and it was different. But it makes me ask myself "what is wrong with me? I can't even get asked out to any dances, am I really that ugly inside and out?" Well I haven't asked anyone that and I really want to. But I probably wont. Im hoping that college will be better for me. Im hoping that guy's will ask me out and I will find the man I will marry. I don't want to be like my sister who is still living at home and isn't married. Well she is 23 but in Utah you get married at 21 or you are old.
Yes I will get married in the LDS temple. Im proud that I have made this decision and Im going to stick to it no matter what.
I don't like watching Chick flicks because they are about love and Im not good with love so I don't watch them. I like comedy chick flicks, well just for the comedy pretty much. I always like a good laugh. Haha
For my 17th birthday my friends made me a poster called "101 things we love about Britney" They all came up with 101 things they like about me and they wrote them down on a bright yellow poster, yellow is my favorie color. They drew pictures on it and everything. When I got that poster I was as happy as can be. I remeber my friend coming up to who was a senior while I was a junior and she was like, "wow you are so happy. You are just bursting with life." All I could do was laugh. I was happy. I read that poster over and over. Some people told me what they wrote and other fought over what they wrote. Haha. Now I think, "Do they still think that?" Well some of my friends, I don't even speak to half of them anymore. After we graduated Im pretty sure they didn't want to see me again. Whatever some of them I think that. Haha but others Im really going to miss when I go to college.
This year for my birthday when I turned 18, I got nothing from my friends. I only got like 3 happy birthday's at school. I was so depressed. These random girls gave me lollipops on the bus cause my brother and his friends sang to me. Then I went to my stake center to play basketball with the young women from my ward. They sang to me. That night I cried. I was so depressed that my friends didn't care about my brithday. All of my other friends got huge flowers, cake, balloons etc for their birthday. It was a depressing birthday. Im glad for the random strangers who will brighten your day. Hanging out with my family was pretty cool but I was still depressed.
This lead into something deeper. Something I haven't told anybody and I never will. This was the worst part of high school, the worst part of life so far. Im not even going to share it with you. Only my family, one of my closest friends in my ward, my YW leader, and my bishop know's. It got better. As I realized what happened I tried to change. School got better. I was having fun. Trail are good and they make me come closer to Havenly Father. :)
Well I have done a lot of talking. I hope you can forgive me for putting all this down at once. Hopefully next time things can be more funny. :) :) :)
When reading romance manga I sometimes realize that a couple of people in the book remind me of my friends. They either remind be of them by appearence or by the way they act. These manga people are mostly in high school. They all have people who fall head over heels for them. Then in real life it happens for people too. Then there's me.
When I was about to turn 16 I was convinced that I would get asked out on that day. Bam nothing. I was hopeful that I would get asked out to homecoming or prom during my high school years. That never happened. For homecoming my senior year I went with one of my really good friends who always makes me feel like a girl and not some low life who is different from all other girls. We had fun with the 6 other girls who also did not get asked. I was so grateful for this friend. She was a junior during this but she is more like a college freshman to me. She has a big heart. I love her. During senior year I was hopeful that I would get asked to any of the other smaller guy ask girl dances. Nope. Prom came around. Someone told me that one of my best friends was going to ask me. I was so excited then I found out that he asked someone else. I was like "whatever he can ask someone else, maybe he wasn't even going to ask me cause I heard that from someone else."
Me and my friend decided to go to prom together because it was are senior year and we wanted to have fun. So we hung out and one of my YW leaders did our hair and then we got dresses, had a photo shoot, and then went down to the dance. At first we didn't know what to do cause it was just us so we hung around some people until our real group of friends came. They broke up into two groups and we hung with the one that let us join. Im glad they let us join. Near the end my "date" ;) was feeling sick and depressed. Depressed because the guy she liked was there with one of our really good friends. During the dance I would always look around just to see who was in the crowded dance area. I would see the other group, the part that split and I would just watch. Then the guy that I like and the one who pretty much tore me apart would be watching me too. It was awkward but I tried to show him that I was having fun without him. We were on the last song or the second to last song and one of my best friends, the one who was going to ask me, comes up to me and say's, "Britney, you look amazing." My heart melted. I never got compliment from a guy, I always get them from girls but not guy's. The other time I got a compliment was at preference earlier that year when I asked my good friends Tall Man. I was picking him up and his mom and sister were both telling me I looked amazing then he comes around the corner and just flats out say's I looks beautiful. That made me happy and at the preference dance he flaunted me around to everyone. Haha. But anyway I was so happy when he said that to me. I tried to give him a compliment back and I told him I liked his hair slicked back. Haha.
I've only been asked out on one date. That was a fun lax date and it was different. But it makes me ask myself "what is wrong with me? I can't even get asked out to any dances, am I really that ugly inside and out?" Well I haven't asked anyone that and I really want to. But I probably wont. Im hoping that college will be better for me. Im hoping that guy's will ask me out and I will find the man I will marry. I don't want to be like my sister who is still living at home and isn't married. Well she is 23 but in Utah you get married at 21 or you are old.
Yes I will get married in the LDS temple. Im proud that I have made this decision and Im going to stick to it no matter what.
I don't like watching Chick flicks because they are about love and Im not good with love so I don't watch them. I like comedy chick flicks, well just for the comedy pretty much. I always like a good laugh. Haha
For my 17th birthday my friends made me a poster called "101 things we love about Britney" They all came up with 101 things they like about me and they wrote them down on a bright yellow poster, yellow is my favorie color. They drew pictures on it and everything. When I got that poster I was as happy as can be. I remeber my friend coming up to who was a senior while I was a junior and she was like, "wow you are so happy. You are just bursting with life." All I could do was laugh. I was happy. I read that poster over and over. Some people told me what they wrote and other fought over what they wrote. Haha. Now I think, "Do they still think that?" Well some of my friends, I don't even speak to half of them anymore. After we graduated Im pretty sure they didn't want to see me again. Whatever some of them I think that. Haha but others Im really going to miss when I go to college.
This year for my birthday when I turned 18, I got nothing from my friends. I only got like 3 happy birthday's at school. I was so depressed. These random girls gave me lollipops on the bus cause my brother and his friends sang to me. Then I went to my stake center to play basketball with the young women from my ward. They sang to me. That night I cried. I was so depressed that my friends didn't care about my brithday. All of my other friends got huge flowers, cake, balloons etc for their birthday. It was a depressing birthday. Im glad for the random strangers who will brighten your day. Hanging out with my family was pretty cool but I was still depressed.
This lead into something deeper. Something I haven't told anybody and I never will. This was the worst part of high school, the worst part of life so far. Im not even going to share it with you. Only my family, one of my closest friends in my ward, my YW leader, and my bishop know's. It got better. As I realized what happened I tried to change. School got better. I was having fun. Trail are good and they make me come closer to Havenly Father. :)
Well I have done a lot of talking. I hope you can forgive me for putting all this down at once. Hopefully next time things can be more funny. :) :) :)
Friday, August 5, 2011
XD
Went to the library today to pick up S.A #10 that I had on hold. I went to their manga section and wow, I got 13 books today. I have like 25 books in my room that are manga and that come from the library. Hahah it makes me so happy when I can get manga books to read. They are so funny. Especially S.A. when I read it at like midnight I start cracking up. Its so funny. To bad this is where I will have to start reading on the internet. I don't mind reading manga on the internet, I just get distracted a lot more. Hahah but I enjoy it. Im going to be reading for the next couple of day's. :) Yah!!!
So I had a dream last night and I want to make it into a manga or a book. I've had three dreams so far that I have written down that I want to make into books. The one I had last night reminded me of Magic Knight Rayearth but I like my dream better. Hahaha.
My favorite Manga so far:
1. Special A (S.A.)
2. 07 Ghost
3. Rurouni Kenshin
4. D.N. Angel
5. St. Dragon Girl
6. Peach Girl
7. Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles
8. Death Note
9. Magic Knight Rayearth
10. Sailor Moon :)
11. Demon Diary
Thats not all of them, I just can't think of all the ones I have read. I read fruits basket when it wasn't popular, its good but eh I don't like popular things......
So I had a dream last night and I want to make it into a manga or a book. I've had three dreams so far that I have written down that I want to make into books. The one I had last night reminded me of Magic Knight Rayearth but I like my dream better. Hahaha.
My favorite Manga so far:
1. Special A (S.A.)
2. 07 Ghost
3. Rurouni Kenshin
4. D.N. Angel
5. St. Dragon Girl
6. Peach Girl
7. Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles
8. Death Note
9. Magic Knight Rayearth
10. Sailor Moon :)
11. Demon Diary
Thursday, August 4, 2011
What?
Im on Facebook right now and Slender Man is messaging me. Im freaked he say's he is going to see me tonight. Im going to hide away in my closet with the RAKE. Hahaha the RAKE is super scary. He clawed at Evans hand in Everymanhybrid. I don't know which is better; Slender Man or the RAKE..... I think I would go with Slender Man, he wont tear my hand up.
Haha anyway's today was a blah day my brother is having a party and he stole the T.V. out of my room and didn't ask me so I yelled at him then locked myself in my room. Then I came up cause I was to freakn bored and did nothing yet again. But I got closer in finishin Pokemon Black and White. That is a good game. One of the most cutest Anime couples ever is probably N and Touko. 2 main characters from that game.
Slender Man is done messaging me, maybe he wont stalk me tonight.... Hopefully he wont I was going to hang out with someone tonight....
Haha anyway's today was a blah day my brother is having a party and he stole the T.V. out of my room and didn't ask me so I yelled at him then locked myself in my room. Then I came up cause I was to freakn bored and did nothing yet again. But I got closer in finishin Pokemon Black and White. That is a good game. One of the most cutest Anime couples ever is probably N and Touko. 2 main characters from that game.
Slender Man is done messaging me, maybe he wont stalk me tonight.... Hopefully he wont I was going to hang out with someone tonight....
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Remember
During me shower, hahaha I know right? I was thinking about the times in elementary. I used to hang out with the "popular" (psh ya right) group. We are going to call my best friend M&M. M&M had money so she got whatever she wanted and whatever she wanted happened. She was awesome I hung out with her a lot and went to a lot of her party's, this is lile second grade. The other girls were cool too, but I just really like M&M. This one girl, named Fashion, told me that she would invite me to her Birthday party if I was nice to her. I was never mean to her I kind of disliked her but never mean, she was the mean one. She even showed me the invite. So for the rest of the week I was nice and guess what miss rootie patootie over there did not invite me. Thats kind of when I started to hang out with other cooler people. Another time I was planned to hang out with Lacrosse, so I was all excited to go hang out with her, she calls me up and say's she can't hang out anymore so I tell my mom and she was like "well Im going to let you just say hi then." So we go over and I see Lacrosse so I thought she changed her mind so my mom left. Soon after my mom leaves another girls show's up. I was pissed but I still hung out with them, yet again this is when I started to hang out with other people who were way more cooler.
Yah it was pretty stupid. Those girls now are all snobs. They all think they are to cool to do anything and none of them are really that smart in different topics. Glad I didn't hang out with them anymore. My friends now are 10 times better then those weirdies.
WellI went to a concert last night with my friends. We sat in the car for 2 hours to get there, stood fore 6, rode back in another 2. I almost died from standing. The singers were good but we were in a cramped space and it was getting hot. But good thing was that there was barely any people. The band we saw was This Century. I didn't really care for them. Im not into that type of music. Im more for Breaking Benjamin, Chevelle, Anberlin, people like that. But anyway we were coming back at like midnight and we were thirsty so we found a Wendy's and ordered some frosty's through the drive through and then we asked for 12waters. They only gave us 9 but there was 7 of us and some was really thirsty. It was funny. The looks on the faces of the employee's was funny.
At the concert I looked up at the ceiling. It looked like there was blood on it. I started to freak out and started to think it was Slender Man. I took a picture of it. I was a little worried for the ride home, I thought I was really going to see him but I didn't.
Yah it was pretty stupid. Those girls now are all snobs. They all think they are to cool to do anything and none of them are really that smart in different topics. Glad I didn't hang out with them anymore. My friends now are 10 times better then those weirdies.
WellI went to a concert last night with my friends. We sat in the car for 2 hours to get there, stood fore 6, rode back in another 2. I almost died from standing. The singers were good but we were in a cramped space and it was getting hot. But good thing was that there was barely any people. The band we saw was This Century. I didn't really care for them. Im not into that type of music. Im more for Breaking Benjamin, Chevelle, Anberlin, people like that. But anyway we were coming back at like midnight and we were thirsty so we found a Wendy's and ordered some frosty's through the drive through and then we asked for 12waters. They only gave us 9 but there was 7 of us and some was really thirsty. It was funny. The looks on the faces of the employee's was funny.
At the concert I looked up at the ceiling. It looked like there was blood on it. I started to freak out and started to think it was Slender Man. I took a picture of it. I was a little worried for the ride home, I thought I was really going to see him but I didn't.
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Happy
Sunday night my friend texted me saying she would buy me a ticket for a concert that I couldn't go to because I am absolutly broke. BTW the ticket was 8 dollars. Your probably thinking, "psh 8 dollars. That is nothing. Go beg your mom or go earn it." Well sorry to say my family is not the rich snoby people. I just decided not to go until she texted. I almost started crying but my mom was sitting right by me that I stopped myself. You see I have been having some difficult times with some of my friends and actually trying to see if they even were my friends or if they were just using me. I get that feeling a lot until she texted me. I was so happy. Still am, still about to cry.
I want to have a party so I can see that one guy. The guy that I posted the huge rant about. Well I still like him. I hated lying to myself so ya. Im going to have a party. I want to see him. I sound so stupid. *stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid! why did you post that? stupid stupid stupid* oh well its true though. Hahaha.
Well nothing really exciting has been happening lately. Hm, Im reading a book called Zeitoun. Its about a guy who lived through Hurrican Katrina. Its very intresting. This is the stupid book I have to read for Connections. We have to somehow connect it to our lives. Yup cause I was in that. Stupid people. Oooo a thought accord to me, Im moving out soon. Weird!!!
I want to have a party so I can see that one guy. The guy that I posted the huge rant about. Well I still like him. I hated lying to myself so ya. Im going to have a party. I want to see him. I sound so stupid. *stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid! why did you post that? stupid stupid stupid* oh well its true though. Hahaha.
Well nothing really exciting has been happening lately. Hm, Im reading a book called Zeitoun. Its about a guy who lived through Hurrican Katrina. Its very intresting. This is the stupid book I have to read for Connections. We have to somehow connect it to our lives. Yup cause I was in that. Stupid people. Oooo a thought accord to me, Im moving out soon. Weird!!!
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